I’ve found myself recently talking to my 15 year old son more and more about money and how to spend it, save it, etc. When I was coming up, my parents never discussed money with me. As an only child, I was severely spoiled and I went into my adulthood not really understanding money and the cost of things. I just bought what I wanted, even when I couldn’t afford it, and it took me years to learn my lesson. Fast forward to the present day. I’m thirty-four and still dealing with my past mistakes where finances are concerned. I’ve finally paid off all but one of my credit cards and I no longer buy on credit unless I can pay it off in full at the end of the month. Most of my financial knowledge now has come from trial and error and watching Suze Orman and various other financial contributors online and on TV.
With my son, I saw that same familiar pattern out of the cloth I was cut from. Spend now, think about the repercussions later. Just recently, I gave him a set amount to spend on winter items. I gave him half of the money one day and the other half the other day to make sure he wasn’t spending too recklessly and when I went through the items he had purchased, I saw that he didn’t get the bang for his buck. His response. “It’s cool. I will get some more money and finish getting the things I need.”
Excuse me. I gave you a great deal of money over the span of two days and all you purchased was three pair of jeans, one pair of shoes, and two hoodies? Oh no, young man. You’ve got to do better.
So last night, I sat him down. I showed him my bank account online. I showed him the deposits. And the withdrawals. How much the electric bill is. The cable bill. The gas bill. The insurance. The taxes that are being taken out of my paycheck every two weeks. Receipts for groceries, gas, and other essentials. We had a long talk.
“Your father contributes to your expenses but I am your mother and what he is giving me doesn’t even put a dent in what I put out in terms of finances,” I said. I didn’t want to air all of the dirty laundry because he didn’t need to hear it, but he needed to know the buck stops here. Money does not grow on trees. You have to be wise with your money. Save. Times are hard. Be grateful for what you have and appreciate it.
I know it’s going to take more than just this hour long talk my son and I had to understand, but I want to open that dialogue now before it’s too late. I don’t want him in debt struggling in his twenties like I did.
Cubicle Chicks and Cubicle Dudes, sound off! Do you talk to your children about money, or if you don’t have kids, when do you think you should start doing so? This is a topic I am sure we can all appreciate so please comment and let me know what you think!
My parents did NOT discuss money nor credit with me, and I am struggling with that to this day. I am 28 have lots of debt that seems like it is never going to go away. I don't have kids but I have a 20 yr old brother who I stay on constantly. I don't want to be up in his business but I teach him a lot being that my last job was at a credit card company so I learned a lot. I now work in the Mortgage business and I am teaching him everything that I learn. There will not be a repeat cycle. So I totally feel you on what you are doing for your kids. Such a great Mama you are. : )
I am also an only child and had a parent, well an entire family, that didn't talk about money. Till this day everybody thinks that they can spend what they don't have and someone in the fam will help them when the time comes. I learned my lesson just watching my mom, and just made sure I did the opposite. I did come upon hard times when I was pregnant, had to transfer schools back home which resulted in me losing both my jobs and not being able to find a new one for a year. I was either under qualified or over. That year was spent on credit. I'm happy to say that I have less than a thousand on credit. My debt is student loans. I recommend everybody to try out mint.com, it changed the way I see my spending.
Wow, well at least you learned from your mistakes and the mistakes that your mother made. Like I said on Twitter, I am going to check out mint.com. I need that in my life. 🙂
YES!My son is just 6 but I’m hoping by laying the foundation early we can spare him some trial and error later. I talk to him about about saving up for the things he wants and also about earning money through chores, etc. I planned to wait until he was older but decided he was ready after a conversation that went something like: “mommy, I want to go to McDonalds” “I don’t know if I have McDonalds money” “Just stick your card in that wall (ATM) and get money back” lol…Thus Mommy’s Money Education program began! Its never too early or too late to equip our kids with life skills.