This past weekend was not the first time I have traveled and have been away from my kids. But for some reason, this last trip really weighed heavily on me. Traveling to events and covering them for my blog and other outlets is now my job and is a way that I provide for my family. But it also takes me away from my the two people I love most in the world. And the more opportunities I receive to travel, the more time I am gone. The guilt is really beginning to set in.
During this last trip, I was away from my daughter for the first time on her birthday. That really made the trip bittersweet because of course I wanted to travel to Vegas to cover event and network, but I also wanted to be there for my daughter. And despite the fact that we celebrated her birthday last week with a very nice party with all of her friends, not being in town on her actual birthday made me feel guilty.
As mothers, we are the binding force of the family and the rock everyone seeks to lean on. In doing so, we put everything on our shoulders, even the things that are too heavy to carry. And the guilt is one of those things that we carry around with us whether we deserve to feel guilty or not—we are supposed to be there for our children in each and every instance. And when we can’t, some of us deal with it by placing blame on our situation or circumstances—if I wasn’t working, I could spend more time with the kids. If I didn’t have to be away, I could be there for my kids. When in essence, we are doing these things FOR our kids because we want them to have a nice life and to be able to take care of the household.
It’s a catch-22.
And as many times as I have traveled, I have never felt guilty about it until now. It could be that I have been on three business trips since the beginning of the year and we are only in February. Or it could be that missing being here on my daughter’s actual birthday was enough to bring everything into perspective.
The thing is this—travel may be a necessity of the business–it is for me. And the reason why I chose this business was that it allowed me to work at home and be there for my children on a daily basis.
When I am gone, my kids are in capable hands. Fathers can do just as good of a job parenting as we can, so when you begin to feel guilty about being away, please think about that.
I am a good mom. I’m not perfect, but I do the best that I can. And I am there for my children as much as I can be. I love them unconditionally and will always have their best interests at heart. And at the end of the day, that is what being a mom is all about.
Do you agree?