I’m almost 50, and I must say–I haven’t felt as confident in my skin as I do now. My twenties were spent finding my way, and during my thirties, it was all about the hustle mentality. Now that I am firmly ensconced in my forties, I am stronger than ever. I’ve finally found my stride, focus, and power and am no longer afraid to walk in it. I’m also feeling super sexy after 40.
What does this all mean? For starters, I know my body–really well. I know what it takes to please me, and I am not afraid to ask for what I want. I know what works well on these hills and valleys of mine and what clothing to stay away from.
Also, I’ve given up trying to be something I am not, which is what midlife is all about. The former people pleasing me is a memory, and I know how to say no to things that I am not excited or passionate about.
What makes me feel sexy after 40? Take a little time to read with me and learn why I feel the most beautiful and authentic.
Imperfection
I spent most of my life searching for perfection—looking perfect, acting perfect, and working perfect. As a Virgo, I feel this trait is embedded inside me, as no one in my family ever told me I needed to be perfect. Around the age of 43, I shed the illusion that perfection was good, and it was impeding my relationships because it was a form of anxiety that I was placing on myself and others.
Since that realization, I’ve been walking in my imperfection and am proud.
Wisdom
A few years ago, I coined this phrase, which I have written on almost everything in my workspace at work and my office at home: knowledge doesn’t become wisdom until it’s applied. This means you can have all the book and street smarts in the world, but if you don’t use them in your life, you are not wise. You aren’t living in your wisdom.
I’m doing better with that now. I lean on my wisdom, and it has begun serving me well, I must say. Live a little, learn a lot.
[Read: Rediscovering Romance- Date Night Over 40]
Over that hill
I’ve been divorced for over five years, and I am finally over that hill and ready to give my heart entirely as a healed woman who knows what she wants. My kids are both grown, and with the empty-nest life I am experiencing, it’s time. I am ready for a life partner.
Sexy is
As sexy does. Sexy over 40 (for me) means being makeup-free, or with a full beat, dressed to the nines or dressed down, with a bold red lip or a nude lippy. It’s walking in your full glory, knowing that you have survived so many things and you’re still standing, still here, and still thriving. It’s not the end–more like the beginning of a new life uninterrupted.
Next year, I will turn 50, and with that, I am sure I will be sharing my journey as a half-centurian. Until then, though, my sexy at 40 is still a vibe.
I’m worth it. And if you are a woman over 40, you are worth it, too.
[…] [Read: What Makes Me Feel Sexy After 40] […]