Working Parents, let’s work together to stop this madness, shall we?
Let’s face it—as working parents, we are often harder on ourselves than we should be. In our quest to the best in all areas of our life, we overcompensate and often over-nourish our professional lives, as to say we are just as good as those at work who don’t have children. I don’t know about you, but I am pretty sick and tired of this trend, and wish it would go away completely. The only difference between us and them as that we have kids and they don’t. We are just as good, just as talented, just as deserving and so on and so forth.
Which is why I am done without comparing myself to others, especially those who aren’t working parents.
So I’ve come up with this list of 5 things working parents need to stop doing immediately for a solid and historic reminder that we don’t have to be all things to all people.
Here we go…
1. Stop Feeling Guilty
Working parent guilt is a plain waste of time. As long as you are not neglecting being a nurturing and loving parent, then you should stop beating yourself up (working moms, this one’s for you). If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times—-parenting is all about quality, not quantity. There are bad stay at home parents who neglect their children (there’s no comprehensive study that says that stay at home parents turn out better kids than working ones)—it’s not about what you do with your time spent with your kids, it’s how you spend time with them. When you aren’t at work, make sure you are present and in the moment with them. Spend moments off the grid doing activities. Tuck them in and read them a story before bed. Say I love you often. These are the things they will remember.
2. Stop Trying So Hard
We get it, you want to be the best working parent in the history of parenting. But you don’t have to be perfect. Relax. Have fun with the kiddos. Make mistakes and learn from them. Stop stressing yourself out. Don’t plan every minute of the day. You don’t have to overcompensate—as long as you are putting in the work, you are all good.
3. Stop Explaining
Don’t be that parent that is always explaining at work and at home because you are late, or not prepared, or forgot something. Let organization be your friend. Take an extra minute to make sure you have it all together, and if you don’t, I promise you it’s okay. No one has it all together, yo. And no one cares about the reason why you did this or that. At home and at work, people only really care about results. So make sure that is your focus as well.
4. Stop Taking It All On By Yourself
As for help. You are not a one woman/one man army. If you are married or have a spouse or co-parent, ask for help—no, insist on it. Get family members to also help you when you need to, and do the same at work as well. Delegate when needed, and don’t try to do it all. Because, let’s face it, you won’t be able to. None of us accomplish everything we have to alone.
5. Stop Putting Yourself Last
You deserve some me-time. Some self care. Some refueling. What you put out most certainly has to be put back so that you can help others while remaining sane. So put yourself first for a change. And when you do, don’t feel guilty about about it.
The key to living a healthy and fruitful life is this: be the best damn parent that you can be, end of story. Don’t compare your parenting to anyone else—you’ve got this this!
Are you guilty of any of the above?
Yes, #5 but no more and no guilt because I take it.