This morning, I had the honor of speaking with a close friend of mine. We haven’t chatted in some time and with her living in a completely different state, it’s hard for us to catch up with one another. So when I saw my Blackberry light up with her name, I was overjoyed; there was so much to tell her and fill her in on. But from the beginning, I could tell that our conversation was going to be going nowhere.
She started the conversation out by saying that she is now working from home and started her own home based business which is thriving. I was happy for her. She always had an entrepreneurial spirit. When she asked if I was at the same job I was the last time we spoke, I told her I was. I love my job. I love property management even though it can be a headache at times. What job isn’t? She then goes on to chastise me for working outside of my home.
“Why don’t you find something you can do at home, hun?” she asked me. “That way, you can be home when the kids get out of school and your daughter won’t have to go to aftercare after school.”
I bit my tongue. She went on and on about how her life is so much better for staying at home. And I know it probably is. For her. But I choose to work outside of my home because I enjoy what I do. And what I do requires me to be on site on my properties. I don’t feel bad for working and for providing for my family. I am not going to let anyone else make me apologize for this either.
When my son was born when I was 18, I had no idea what would become of me. Maybe I would have to go on welfare. Maybe I would always be stuck in a minimum wage job. Fortunately, I had a family, a father whom insisted I attend college. And I received my degree and I worked hard and I got jobs in which I made good money. First in HR and then in Property Management and Real Estate. I got married and had my now five year old daughter and I couldn’t wait to get back to work. It didn’t mean that I didn’t love my daughter, it just meant that I enjoy work and working outside of my home. I do not want to be judged because of my choice.
I am sorry for this rant, but I am tired of some women making others feel bad because they decide they want to do things outside of the “traditional” norms. I am proud of being a working mother and my kids are proud of me, for they let me know this every once in a while. The people who determine if I am a good mother or not is my son and my daughter, period point blank, not anyone else who seems to have judgement.
I will not feel guilty for my choice.
Whether you decide to work in the home or not, we are all still mothers.
Mothers who love our children.